Sometimes I ask myself, do you have any what ifs? Do you think about us? Do you wish something is different? Do you? Sometimes I just want to have a drink or meet up with you and talk about anything, talk about the unfinished business. Then I ask myself, is there really anything worth talking about? Some things are better left unsaid they say. But heck, I don't want to have this unfinished feeling. And I realized, I do have a lot of unfinished business with people. Some are just left hanging or even ignored. If I have to apologize to each and everyone, I don't think I can even make it before I die. Haha.
On other note, some friendships ended and some started. I still wondered what happened between that person and I sometimes? Did I do something wrong to you that you just ended our friendship? I thought everything was fine. If you don't like something I do just tell it to me, if it's something bad I will change it but if it's just something you can't accept from me, I don't see any point changing just to befriend you. At least I think my friend should be able to accept who I really am. When you just turn your back to me in a snap I was in dazed. Puzzled. Confused. But yeah, life goes on. And I really do hope you succeed in life and meet better friend. No hard feelings. I still want the best for you. You were such an interesting friend and it was such a waste in my opinion that our friendship ended.
And sometimes I just think, my gosh, was I such a bitch in high school? Was I such a spoil brat? I think I was really childish and unable to control my emotion and people misunderstood me sometimes. I do regret some of the things that I've done in the past. I wish I was such a better roommate for my roommate. I wish I was a better friend. I wish I was a better cousin. I wish. And all these wishes will never come true. But yeah, I think I can always fix my bad qualities now before it's too late.
How do I get here? From talking about the past with my friend which reminded me of you and then I realize. Maybe I was a bitch, a much bigger one than I thought I was. What is this reflections for no reason? Nah. Idc.